WHAT IS A SEX SURROGATE?
A surrogate partner is a trained professional who works with clients in sex therapy as part of a three-way team in conjunction with an accredited or licensed therapist. The surrogate is a nurturing partner to the client, helping him build his skills in the areas of physical and emotional intimacy achieved through experiences involving communication, relaxation, sensual and sexual touching and social skills training.
Sessions with the therapist are interwoven with the surrogate/client sessions, and "an open, honest, consistent communication among all participants is a fundamental ingredient of successful surrogate partner therapy" as stated by IPSA, the International Professional Surrogates Association (see Surrogates Page). The surrogate and therapist collaborate jointly to move the client forward effectively toward reaching his personal goals.
HOW IS A SURROGATE TRAINED ?
A surrogate has completed an accredited training program in the field of sexuality including human physiology, open communication, psychological and relationship issues. She has studied the skills of intimacy, in many cases, more intensively than many counselors who may only be required to take one class in human sexuality to qualify for their advanced degrees.
She has undergone intensive training usually conducted by a licensed therapist or accredited counseling center resulting in certification. In addition, there are certain qualities and life experiences which seem to provide a valuable background to surrogacy. According to IPSA, non-judgmental attitudes toward others' choice of lifestyle, good judgment, compassion, and sexual comfort are important as well.
CAN I CHOOSE WHICH SURROGATE I WOULD LIKE TO WORK WITH?
A surrogate is a sensual guide and teacher. She is not meant to be your ideal woman in terms of appearance, age, height, or weight. Most surrogates are everyday looking woman. She could be the woman in the pharmacy, or you could walk by her in the grocery store. You have the opportunity to select your ideal woman when you date.
Surrogates are not dating partners nor Pamela Anderson wannabees. You judge a surrogate by her experience, training, insight, knowledge and life wisdom. You want the most skilled, caring and compassionate woman to work with you as a surrogate. You feel comfortable in her presence as she gently guides you through the process.
WHY WOULD I WORK WITH A SURROGATE?
If you want to experience more open communication and vibrant sensuality, partnering with a surrogate can be the perfect connection. We surrogates use the celebrated Masters & Johnston technique of sensate focus, along with other specialized techniques to help you learn the intimate language of the sexes. I include within my expertise, the ability to help you expand your sexual awareness for the following reasons:
- Shedding inhibitions/shyness
- Sensual Exploration
- Jump-Starting tired sex life
- Intimate communication
- Body image acceptance.
- Premature ejaculation
- Erectile problems/impotence
- Adult virginity
- Delayed ejaculation/fear of "letting go."
- Boosting low libido
- Dead Bed--fading passion
- Desire Discrepancy.
* Surrogacy is not a glitzy quick fix--it is an experiential path of profound change that requires genuine commitment, time, and effort.
WHAT IS THE SUCCESS RATE OF SURROGATES?
The substantial success rate of surrogacy has been proven over time. According to a leading sex researcher in San Francisco, surrogates have a 90% success rate in treating sexual concerns as well as significantly enhancing the joy of sex for others who want to enrich their enjoyment of intimacy.
None of us is really ever taught about sexuality. Surrogacy is the "nut 'n' bolts" sex education class that neither our parents, schools or church provided when we really needed it. It's no wonder that most surrogate clients feel as if a whole new dimension of life opens for them through the experience.
There is no typical surrogate client. They may range from l8 to 85, single, white or blue collar, students or CEO's, both able-bodied and physically challenged. For these many diverse clients, surrogacy becomes a learning adventure in self-fulfillment that few have experienced.
HOW MUCH DOES SURROGATE THERAPY COST
There is a wide range of fees charged by surrogates who are independent contractors.
Fees vary markedly depending upon the surrogate's years of experience in the field. Those who've been practicing for a longer period of time may charge higher fees. Some work in 1 hour increments and others have 2 hour sessions.
This is general information. You need to speak with a specific surrogate to learn her rates and working style.
Sex partner fees also vary.
HOW LONG DOES SURROGATE THERAPY TAKE?
Surrogates usually work with their clients from 4 to 6 months although many individuals work longer to fully resolve their problems. Oftentimes, sexual problems stem from deep seated psychological issues and these need to be addressed in order to treat the sexual problem. Each person is different and requires a specially tailored approach.
Check with a surrogate or a sex therapist familiar with the Surrogate Partner Process.