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Brian

Brian wanted to expand his experience of sexuality after a recent, difficult divorce from his wife of 22 years. He was feeling apprehensive about entering the dating scene and was unsure about his ability to please a woman.

Tara patiently taught me ‘The ropes of sensate focus touching which helped me reconnect with the sensual part of myself that got lost during my marriage.’ She helped me move through my feelings of sadness about the break up as I rediscovered my own buried feelings of sexuality. My self confidence has been boosted and I have just started dating. I feel that my life has been reborn–and I’ve been given a second chance at life!

Brian, age 44
Beverly Hills, CA

Susan

Susan lost her desire for sex after the birth of her first child. Although she and her husband had been very sexual in the early years of their marriage, her desire seemed to evaporate. She was very distressed.

I didn’t realize how stressed out I was with taking care of the baby. I was also feeling resentful that I was doing all the parenting and my husband didn’t seem be willing to help out. Tara helped us open up our lines of communication. My husband starting helping out with the housework. I felt really appreciated for the first time in a long while. Within a month, I felt my sex drive return.

Susan, age 32
Portland, OR

Adam

Adam lived with a variety of fetishes since he was a teenager. He hid them from everyone because he felt so ashamed. When he called me, he had not told anyone about his sexual preferences. He finally decided to reveal his secret.

I lived with the constant pressure of hiding the real me from the world. I was really nervous when I called Tara. I thought she would laugh at me. But she was accepting, and really understood my fetishes. This was the first time I was able to talk openly to anyone. It was such a tremendous relief.

Adam, age 21
Biloxi, MS

Fred

Fred has had a problem with premature ejaculation for the past 10 years. He tried distracting himself to last longer by thinking about anything that would deter him from rapid ejaculation. He was embarrassed and started withdrawing from sexual relations with his girlfriend.

I had a fast trigger since I was a teenager. I thought it was helpless—I did some experimenting but nothing worked. Tara taught me that I could prolong my arousal without mental gymnastics. The relaxed technique she taught me was totally different than what I thought it would be—and it really works! My intimate life is fantastic. I get to really feel sexual for a long time—not just 1 minute!

Fred, age 48
Atlanta, GA

Elisha

Elisha was not able to orgasm with a partner although she had no problem climaxing during masturbation. She felt “like a freak’ and wanted to find out why she couldn’t let go with a lover.

I realized that I was having sex too soon with my dating partners. It wasn’t right for me. So I wasn’t really relaxed or completely trusting. Tara guided me through relaxation and guided imagery exercises I changed the way I dated, decided that what worked for me was to wait awhile before becoming involved in sex.Then I met Tony, the fabuous man who was patient and loving. One night I just effortlessly had my first orgasm. WOW!

Elisha, age 34
Salt Lake City, UT

Richard

Richard was starting to notice changes in his ability to achieve and maintain a long-lasting erection. He had been using a sexual medication but was unhappy with its side-effects and was uncomfortable with the prospect of becoming dependent upon a drug to rev-up his libido.

I was a skeptic…I really didn’t think I could wean myself away from sexual drugs but my erections were a flop without it. With Tara’s expertise, she guided me through the therapy with compassion, humor, and wisdom. I learned techniques that will carry me a lifetime as I continue to pursue life with greater sexual enthusiasm.

Richard, age 64
San Juan Capistrano, CA

Denise

Denise was frustrated with her sex life with her boyfriend. He had asked her to marry him, but she was hesitant. She didn’t feel that she was getting the touching and foreplay she needed to make it an enjoyable experience for her. She was feeling bored. It was the same thing over and over.

I am so happy now. Tara helped me see that my behavior was the problem. I never really asked for what I wanted or showed my boyfriend how to touch me. I was nervous about talking about sex. Now I feel confidant expressing myself. He actually thinks it’s a turn-on to be with an expressive woman. And I am thrilled with my intimate life.

Denise, age 50
Glendale, CA

Chester

Chester had prostate surgery 5 years ago. After few failed attempts at intercourse, he just assumed that his sex life was over. He and his wife stopped trying to have sex. Although they were older, they both secretly desired to connect sensually. But they withdrew from each other and didn’t even kiss.

I can’t believe it. At my age, 85, I am having sex again. My wife and I are like two kids in a candy store. I love touching her and I get erections. I feel just like my old (younger) self. We spend a lot of time loving each other, not rocking on the porch.

Chester, age 85
Scottsdale, AZ

Carrie

Carrie was recently divorced and on the dating scene after 25 years. She was painfully shy. She was attractive and very bright, but froze when she talked to a man she found handsome. She didn’t date very much and was convinced she was going to be an “old maid.”

No more dinner with my mother on Saturday night. I’m too busy dating. Tara helped me understand the anxiety that was preventing me from being more outgoing. We actually role played and examined every part of the dating dance, as she calls it. We rehearsed all kinds of dating scripts. It was so helpful. I no longer get tongue-tied when I meet a hot man. I’m dating more now than I ever have. I have more choices in men so I know I will choose the right one.

Carrie, age 63
Boston, MA

Peter

Peter was a virgin. He had been an electrical engineer and was now retired. He had never sought out therapy thinking, as the years passed, that he was “beyond help.” He had been abused as a child and had painfully memories of his parents, and what he saw as a marital relationship.

Well, here’s the story. Two years ago I got married. When I met Peggy (his 42 year old wife) I was scared as hell at the thought of having sex. But I loved her so much, and I had come a long way in my therapy. I just let her love me and I loved back. A year later we got married. And the next year later we had our baby girl. I cried for days with joy thinking this would never happen to me. Of course, we named her Tara.

Peter, age 60
Columbia, SC

George

George was plagued with feelings of shame whenever he masturbated. He had been brought up in a religious household where he was taught that masturbating was a sin. His father once caught him touching himself and he was whipped. He carried these guilty feelings into adulthood.

It’s so liberating to feel good about myself and my body. I can enjoy the sensations I get from my body without feelings bad. I feel like I’ve been let out of prison and I am finally free. Not only do I feel that masturbating is a wonderful activity but my whole attitude toward sex has become more positive and I just feel happier.

George, age 26
Chicago, IL

Selena and Jay

Selena and Jay called because they’d always had a problem in their marriage with differing sex drives. Jay had a low sex drive and Selena felt disappointed and frustrated. He had taken several urological tests to evaluate his testosterone level and everything was fine. The more she wanted, the more he withdrew. Touching stopped.

We learned valuable communication skills that enabled us to start talking to each other in a non-critical way. Then we stared negotiating—really honestly, without blame—about how we could make our sex life work. Tara taught us lots of great sensual touching games. She also suggested that I introduce Jay to my vibrator. Then he got a sex toy of his own. We learned how to have fun again and feel relaxed with sex. We’re having more sex and I’ve explored new ways of pleasuring myself.

Selena and Jay, age 39
Manhattan, NY